What must you have Ð yet you can never use it?

Date Published: 07-Mar-2013

Insurance­ – what is it good for? You have to have it, but can never use it. I’ve searched the cosmoverse for anything else that fits the paradigm of insurance, and have come up with a blank.

If I don’t have insurance I’m not allowed to drive, yet if I ever use my insurance, my premium goes through the roof, and I can’t afford to drive.

A few years ago, a good friend of mine lost all his possessions in a house fire. I was extremely impressed that even as a tenant, he’d insured all the contents of his house.

Inspired, I decided to display some adult behaviour, found a company that would offer me a contents-only policy, and sat back feeling all safe and secure.

During one of the storms a few weeks ago we lost all power to the house for 18 hours. After a sleepless night of torches, rattling roof tiles and crashing hailstones, I felt and looked a lot like the contents of my freezer: mushy and well dodgy, respectively.

Hauling all the spoiled food into a bin bag, I consoled myself with the knowledge that I was insured. I’d been a grown-up and paid good money, so that a minor inconvenience like this needn’t turn into a disaster.

There was about €140 worth of grub in there, so we’re not talking about economic ruin, but doubtless like many of you, these days I’m not in a position to add that figure to any week’s budget without hurting a fair bit.

Tired and grumpy, I knew I needed to call the insurance company pronto, but suspected the whole thing might turn into a hassle. I wobbled off to read the policy manual and felt calmer. Freezer contents were covered to an unlimited amount, and there was no excess to pay.

Exhausted, I tried to put on my happy smiley face and called the insurance company. After explaining the situation to a woman in the claims department, I asked two questions.

Is claiming for my freezer contents going to be a major hassle?

And if I claim, will that affect my premium?

She told me that no, it shouldn’t be a hassle at all. She didn’t suppose I’d taken photos of the freezer contents?

Forcing down my exhausted emotions as one would if resisting projectile vomit, I told her that no, ha ha, as it happens, ha ha, when I finally abandoned trying to sleep last night, and then found my food all soggy and stinky, it didn’t cross my mind that this squidgy mess of rotting ready meals might look rather natty in the family photo album.

Instead, I suggested I’d keep the receipts of all the shopping I’d do, to replace the lost items. How about that, eh? Then there’d be proof that I was out of pocket.

Fine, said she, giving me the Dublin phone number of a claims handler and a claim number. Apparently the claims handler would be the one to advise me as to whether my premium would go up or not.

“Oh and could you please send me a claims form?”

“Of course. It’ll be in the post to you today.”

For more, read this week’s Galway City Tribune.