New Year predictions take an early bath after Tiger’s spate of birdies

Date Published: 30-Dec-2009

One of the predictions in this year’s Old Moore’s Almanac has already been rendered very unlikely. According to Old Moore’s Tiger Woods will win the Masters and British Open but the sportsman has, for now, taken time out from the game because of his domestic problems.

But who knows, maybe Tiger will change his mind (depending on whether his wife divorces him or not) and be back in form because since Theophilus Moore started publishing his Almanack (sic) two and half centuries ago, farmers have sworn by his information about tides, the weather and his predictions. 

Apparently many of his predictions have come true though the faithful readers of the modern Old Moore’s Almanac are more inclined to buy it as a guide to the year’s marts schedules, though there is also a list of all the major racing festivals, as well as a monthly calendar.

But Christmas Week, Hurricane Fly was injured casting a doubt on the racehorse’s participation at Cheltenham this year – Old Moore had predicted the horse would win the Champion Hurdle. 

This year, according to Old Moore, the English Queen will step down and hand over the reins to Prince Charles, who will become extremely popular with the Irish; Madonna will marry again, this time to a man her own age; Oprah will retire and Bin Laden will be found dead in one of his caves. 

Apart from that and that Nicole Kidman will have her second child and that Michelle Obama will become pregnant during the year, the predictions are suitably vague and easily open to interpretation. 

There are general predictions about the Irish Government, about Bertie’s health and the economy though it does predict that Irish will no longer become compulsory in schools giving way to Russian and Chinese languages. 

This May, the housing market will hit rock bottom and the price of a house will be just a few short euro away from the price of a bag of spuds! 

Other news is that one of the young English princes will be in helicopter crash, one of the Maldive islands will disappear under water due to global warming and a low budget Irish movie will be an international success. 

There’s no good news for Galway GAA followers however because Cork will win the football and Kilkenny will win the hurling, Spain will win the World Cup; and Toulouse will win the Heineken Cup. For all the other sporting predictions, buy the book! 

But the consolation is that, apparently, we are going to have a great summer weatherwise, and farmers will enjoy a great crop – and that’s probably the best news in the whole book, priced at €4 in most shops.