Benjy’s ‘coming out’ was a masterstroke in survival

Country Living with Francis Farragher

First and foremost a declaration of interest, like any honourable Fianna Fáil or Fine Gael rural TD would do if they had money in a foreign bank. I do have a share in two local establishments in the business of dispatching alcohol, having contributed on a weekly basis to their coffers for a long number of years, although I’m told that my shareholding has no legal standing.

Anyway the other night, I was rounded upon from a crowd who tend to inhabit the more raucous part of one those establishments, for my ‘grievous error’ in not writing about the gay bull story from Mayo, that of course has done the rounds of social media across the world.

This cohort of rural imbibers had no interest whatsoever in the current cattle prices, the Single Farm Payment or the price of turkeys for the coming Christmas. There was only one issue on their minds and that was to see, read and find out more about Benjy, the now forever famous Mayo bull, who apparently showed more of an amorous interest in his male colleagues, than the herd of delectable heifers that he should be mating with.

It was a real pressure situation for me, especially with the first pint not fully consumed – leading to a consequent lack of courage – to be confronted by this frenzied group of customers who had been at the watering hole, at least two hours ahead of me. “What are you going to do about the gay bull? What farm is he on? How did he turn out like this?” and of course the final damning line of, “Why haven’t you something about Benjy in the paper this week.” There was no instant reply: quite simply I had no magic cure for the gay bull.

This cabal had little interest in appeasement and were not at all impressed with a reply that the only Benjy I ever heard of publicly before this, was the character from ‘The Riordans’ TV series of the 1960s and 1970s. Come to think of it, that Benjy also got into a sexual complication too back the years, when trying to get his evil way with Maggie behind the bushes, an adventure that drew the ire of some members of the Tuam Town Commissioners of the time. The very thought of sex on the TV, even on black and white television, with the bushes blocking out any part of the action, was seen as a prompter of fornication and all things immoral in good old Catholic Ireland.

So the moral of that little diversion is to be wary of anyone with the Benjy tag attached, whether it be human, bovine or canine, as they have to be treated with a certain amount of respect, in relation to any extra-curricular activities that they might be engaged in. Over the coming weekend, I hope though to reassure my noisy neighbours in the far corner of the bar, that now all is well and happy as regards Benjy, with moves afoot to transfer him to an animal sanctuary in the UK, where he never again will be insulted with the presence of heifers in his field, and where he will avoid forever more, the prospect of being carved into chunks of fillet and sirloin steak. It’s not all plain sailing though for Benjy as he may be facing the ‘big snip’ at his new home, but that’s another day’s work.

For more, read this week’s Connacht Tribune.